Tetherd Cow Ahead

Sat 24 Oct 2009

How Now Brown Cow?

Posted by anaglyph under Competition!, TCA Shoppe
[228] Comments

Funniest comment wins an awesome Simple Graphics Man coffee mug.

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Thanks Kirke! (via Urlesque, via Everything Random – original domain unknown)

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Thu 22 Oct 2009

Koffee Klutz

Posted by anaglyph under Cow Matters, Simple Graphics Man, TCA Shoppe
[13] Comments

The thought that occurred to me in the middle of the last post was, Faithful Acowlytes, that perhaps I was being a little shortsighted in so perfunctorily dismissing Simple Graphics Man as an appropriate mentor for the ‘lesser’ risks of a busy life.

To that end, I’ve stirred the elves in the Tetherd Cow Ahead Gift Shoppe from their hundred year slumber and I am pleased to announce the launch of the Tetherd Cow Ahead Simple Graphics Man™ Collection!

In these modern times, it’s not always easy to keep your wits about you every single minute, so who better to alert you to the perils inherent in your favourite caffeinated beverage than good ol’ SGM? These unique drinking vessels, handcrafted from the finest alabaster and lovingly detailed by skilled Nubian artisans are only suited to the discerning few. ((i.e. anyone with money)) A large mug will set you back $14.50 Australian, and the standard size a very reasonable $13.50. ((A little less than those numbers if you’re paying US dollars)) You know you can’t do without one – so don’t wait until you scald yourself again before forking out! Think of it as insurance!

Remember – Christmas is not far off – shop now to avoid disappointment! And you will, of course, be keeping Simple Graphics Man gainfully employed.

What are you waiting for? Go to the gift shop and spend some money!

Wed 21 Oct 2009

The Ladder of Liability

Posted by anaglyph under Simple Graphics Man
[19] Comments

The Continuing Misfortunes of Simple Graphics Man ~

#37: The Ladder of Liability.

One has to think that calling in SGM to warn people about the dangers of using a ladder is starting to seem like hysteria. It’s a LADDER for chrissakes! Next we’ll have SGM cautioning us to be careful that we don’t get our toes jammed in the front door, or that our coffee might be hot! ((Hmmm. Actually, that gives me an idea…))

Really, it’s a complete waste of his talents and in this particular example you can tell that he’s just doing the gig for the money. Overacting much?

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This one sent in by Atlas. Thanks!

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Tue 20 Oct 2009

Unfortunate ‘Catchy’ Retail Names #2

Posted by anaglyph under Daft Advertising, Sex, Silly, Words
[14] Comments

He said what?

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Thanks to Atlas (who else?) for bringing this to the attention of The Cow.

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Mon 19 Oct 2009

A Message from Uranus?

Posted by anaglyph under In The News, Science, Signs, Skeptical Thinking
[9] Comments

This strange cloud anomaly over Moscow was captured on video last week. Predictably enough, the loonies are out in force attempting to ‘explain’ it and we’ve had everything from a ‘HAARP mothership’ ((If you don’t know what HAARP is, do a Search™, but be warned, your brain may rot due to a deluge of stupidity)) to a Sign of the End Times. More than a few have obsessed over the black dots that fly across frame at about the 5 second mark (birds, you idiots) and the most perplexing thing about the whole phenomenon is that there doesn’t seem to be – anywhere that I could find – a single rational attempt to explain it. I also note that there doesn’t seem to be any other footage of this odd event – in this era of ubiquitous image-capturing devices that does seem to me to be slightly unusual. Unless of course everybody who was actually there found it unremarkable, which is another fairly hefty indicator that it’s not a spaceship from Zeta Reticuli.

For the record, my hypothesis is that underneath it somewhere there is a source of thermal disturbance, perhaps a power station, which has caused some kind of convection activity in the low clouds above.

UPDATE: A single user comment on one of the many propagations of the video led me to a possible expanation: a hole-punch or fallstreak cloud. You can see lots of examples by doing a Search™. Hole-punch clouds are caused by aircraft disturbing thin cloud layers. If this is a hole-punch cloud, it is particularly unusual for its symmetry.

Fri 16 Oct 2009