About 7 times out of every 10 that I blog about WooWoo beliefs, I get someone taking exception to what I’ve written and alleging that I’m ‘close-minded’ or ‘I should give it a go’ before I cast any criticisms on whatever it is upon which I am casting criticism.

Mostly those comments are placed well after the post is relevant, and just go unread by anyone except me (unless, of course, you’re fond of scrolling back through old Cow comments for entertainment). Occasionally, though, I decide to bring such commentary up front and attempt to throw some illumination on why irrational thinking annoys me so much. Today, I offer you one such example. On the recent post Global WooWoo, Luc writes:

There are many aspects of human life which we don’t understand. Just because we don’t understand how something work doesn’t mean it doesn’t. Skeptics are everywhere. Reading something and actually doing it or in this case try the product are different if not opposite. Just because it doesn’t work on you, name calling those who actually tried the product and them experience something from the product is not some one I would call an expert. You called yourself a Reverend, how do I know that. To me you’re some guy blogging in the internet. I don’t think we should be so quick to judge something or in your case condemn it before trying.

Sigh. Where to start. I think it’s gotta be a line-by-line. Luc. Are you sitting comfortably? Very well, let’s begin.

There are many aspects of human life which we don’t understand.

Yes there are. I have never disagreed with that statement. But if you’re going to try and sneak idiotic thinking under the fence with that, you picked the wrong guy.

Just because we don’t understand how something work doesn’t mean it doesn’t.

Also true. However, if you have a good, rational, grasp of the world, you can infer the probability of something working or not working for a good many practical cases. I will provide an example in a moment.

Skeptics are everywhere.

Yes we are. And our numbers are growing. Be afraid.

Reading something and actually doing it or in this case try the product are different if not opposite.

Even though that sentence is fairly incoherent, I think I get the gist of it. You’re saying that I should try before I sound off, right?

Luc, let’s do a little experiment together, you and I. Do you have a hammer, Luc? Yes? Do you have some ordinary table salt?[tippy title=”*”]This is a typical piece of WooWoo misdirection – an implausible claim is dressed up by some irrelevant distraction thrown in to lead your thinking process astray. Why salt? Same reason as Schumann Waves/holograms/magnets etc[/tippy] Good. Now take that hammer and sit at your dining room table – clear a little space in front of you to make it easier. Now Luc, put a little salt on the table – about a teaspoonful, and spread it out a bit. Now, place your left hand on the table on top of the salt, and take the hammer in your right hand (or vice versa if you’re left-handed). OK, now, put your trust in me and follow my instructions very carefully – raise the hammer as high as you can from your sitting position and with it, hit your left hand as hard as you can. I know it sounds scary, but you have to try it! Seriously! The salt will stop the hammer from doing any damage! Trust me, this really works! It won’t hurt a bit.

Oh Luc… I see you’re not trusting me here! Don’t you believe me? You don’t have any faith, Luc!

Can you see what’s happening here, Luc? You chose not to hit your hand because your rational knowledge of the world gave you enough useful information to make an appraisal of the probable outcome. Your brain balanced up the usefulness of trusting me against the likeliness of the excruciating pain of crushed fingers and you sensibly chose to ignore my instructions.[tippy title=”†”]At least I hope so – if you actually went ahead and did it, then you’re an idiot beyond salvaging and I wish you the best of luck for the rest of what will almost certainly be a short and crappy life.[/tippy]

This is how critical thinking works. You can make intelligent, informed choices about things (and avoid pain or financial embarrassment) without trying them yourself. As I’ve said elsewhere, I don’t need to try and live on nothing but fresh air for three weeks to know that that’s a fairly moronic idea. Do you see what I’m saying here? I don’t have to try idiotic magic bracelets or socks to have an informed opinion on the likelihood of them having any practical effect. And you see how it works, Luc? The more you understand about the world, the better positioned you are to form such opinions.

Just because it doesn’t work on you, name calling those who actually tried the product and them experience something from the product is not some one I would call an expert.

Again, navigating around the baffling sentence structure, I infer you to be attempting to say that if something doesn’t work on me, then I can’t say that it doesn’t work on someone else.

Well, sadly for your argument Luc, I can say exactly that. You see, in a case like this, it’s not me that has to put up the proof. I’m not the one making the far-fetched claims. If someone makes magic socks that are supposed to have magical effects, then the onus is on them to show me persuasive evidence that the magic socks are doing what is claimed. And – listen carefully – this does not mean diffuse, imprecise, anecdotal evidence that could easily be explained in numerous other ways. This means clear, unequivocal, testable substantiation of the claims.

You called yourself a Reverend, how do I know that.

Oh, so now you’re a skeptic! You see how easy that was?!

As for me being a Reverend, well, I was ordained by the Universal Life Church on November 16, 2005, and have the documents to prove it. My credentials are as good as, or even better than, anyone selling QLink or EFX.

I don’t think we should be so quick to judge something or in your case condemn it before trying.

Exactly what makes you think I’m being ‘quick’ to condemn this nonsense, Luc? Quite to the contrary, my condemnation of these idiotic tsotchkes is based on many years of experience of thousandss of similar trinkets all claiming to deliver a cornucopia of incredible results. Do you hear what I’m saying? Whatever gadget happens to be your particular favourite is just as much a piece of junk as a Biorhythm calculator, a razor-blade sharpening pyramid, a carbolic ball, a violet wand, a magnetic fuel saver, an electronic pest repeller, BluWave & RedWave and any of hundreds more implausible devices created by people intent on bilking you of your money.

Luc, I will end this reply by asking you one simple thing: show me your evidence. If it is good, I WILL be convinced. But I will put up with no airy-fairy maybe-it-did-maybe-it-didn’t nonsense. I want results. Clear, unequivocal, unbiased results. Surely that’s only a small thing to ask? If your favourite gadget does something easily defined and obvious, then that should be a pretty easy thing to provide. If, however, the claims of its manufacturers are blurry, vague and equivocal, then maybe you should be asking yourself some serious questions.

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*This is a typical piece of WooWoo misdirection – an implausible claim is dressed up by some irrelevant distraction thrown in to lead your thinking process astray. Why salt? Same reason as Schumann Waves/holograms/magnets etc

†At least I hope so – if you actually went ahead and did it, then you’re an idiot beyond salvaging and I wish you the best of luck for the rest of what will almost certainly be a short and crappy life.

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